There are billions of blogs out there.
(Cue the random food porn)
Maybe you read one or two (thanks for choosing mine as your selected few). Maybe you read hundreds. I don’t really care how many you read, as long as you read mine.
Anyhow, blogs aren’t exactly snowflakes. Many are so much alike that I wonder if the author is so bored, they started writing a brand new one in addition to their old one just to kill time (um, do these people have jobs? Or a sexually satisfied partner?).
So to make your life easier, I thought I’d categorize the different blogs for you:
Political blogs: Such blogs are popular among non-bloggers because nearly everyone gives a damn about politics. You are sure to find a blog out there that will support SOMETHING you believe in. Whether you think cats should have the right to have abortions, or whether you think marijuana should be sold in vending machines, there is a political blog for you.
“This Is What I Ate” Blog: It’s no surprise that these blogs don’t interest me. Unless you are Anthony Bourdain; I’m dying to know what that dude has for breakfast. Such blogs also fall into the “cute-food-name” stereotype; using big words like “yummers” and “bloobs”. I don’t understand them, like are we all supposed to read in envy? How do we know they aren’t lying? Maybe I’ll start a blog of what I eat and put weird stuff like old shoes and hair. Cause nothing is as tasty as some hair with a side of boots for supper. And nothing makes my brain vomit like describing such a feast as, “yummers”.
“Trick Me Into Clicking” blog: These blogs have those obnoxious ad programs installed that double underline words on the page and provide you with an ad if you mistakenly click. As soon as I see those fake links on a blog post I refuse to read further. I assume the post was written by a Jew (I’m a Jew, so this joke is politically correct) solely to make money on the ads and not to provide me with any useful or interesting.
Travel Blogs: I hate these blogs. Not in the way I hate Kim Kardaishian, but in the I-am-so-jealous-of-your-life-way. These blogs are more enjoyable when I have money in the bank to actually go to the destinations they write about. But if you like day-dreaming about travel, you might fancy these blogs. I wish these blogs wrote more about how to score super cheap plane tickets/hotel rooms or how to smuggle food past the TSA. Hell, even mile-high club stories would be entertaining (and possibly gross).
Food Porn Blogs: They take pretty pictures and make you all tingley inside. Also known to cause, drool and “foodgasms”.
On a Mission Blogs: These blogs are on a mission. “Losing 100 pounds in 40 days!” or “Going Vegan for a Year!” or, “Replacing my Boyfriend with My iPad for a Month!”. You read them because your curious to see if they can do it or totally crash and burn. I’m personally dying to know if that girl with cheated on the iPad, and I’m totally not touching that iPad.
The Train Wrecks: You may read them every single day and never even comment on a single post. They are usually painfully pathetic, but yet you can’t help but look because its like a train wreck, and you just have to watch. I should know better, but there are few blogs I never comment on but I know they are just a lovely mess and I can’t help but join in the rubbernecking. Fess up, I know you’ve done it!
What are the categories of blogs YOU read? Which category do think you belong in? I think I belong in the “So-stupid-they-think-they-are-funny-or-something-and-here’s-a-recipe” category.
(makes about four generous portions)
- 1 cup coconut flour (all purpose is fine too)
- 1/2 cup sugar or sweetener of choice
- 1 tsp baking powder
- 1 tbs peanut butter
- 1/2 cup milk of choice or water
- 1 tsp kosher salt (save half the salt to sprinkle on top before you bake)
- 1/4 cup chopped roasted and salted peanuts (or any nut of choice, I also used walnuts in my “nut mix”)
- 1/4 cup cocoa powder
- 1 egg or 1/4 cup egg subsitute
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Simply mix the wet and dry ingredients together throughly. Pour into a pan (I used a loaf pan and not normal brownie pan because this only makes four servings). Pour the chopped nuts and kosher salt on top and pat down with you palm so they stick onto the batter. Bake for 20-25 minuets or until the cent is firm. Allow to cool for about 5 min before taking it out of the pan.
And even thought I’m not “that kind” of blog, I ate some today.