A Blogger Rite of Passage: CONFESSIONS!

Yes, I know I’m on vacation. But this is a quickie. More guest posts to come.

But since hanging out with some other blog friends, I’ve realized, “Wow, I’m a blogger and I have never done a ‘confessions’ post”.

So maybe its time for a “Confessions” post?

Get excited.

  • I’m a raw foodiest (Stictly raw meat, raw beans, raw cookie dough, raw wood, raw coal, raw paper). And wow, I need to go to the toilet….

 

  • My Mom’s a woman

 

  • I’m a man

 

  • I have an online dating profile because I need blog material

 

  • I sleep with pussy (and I like it)

 

  • I wrote a book called “Cankles and Canker Sores”

 

  • I never trust a fat toddler with sticky hands

 

  • I found an extra belly button sewn inside my skin

 

  • When my foot’s asleep, I go through his things

 

  • I thought the “M” in “MILF” stood for “mannequin”

 

  • I have so many keys on my key ring that I dont use because I’m trying to impress people with all the doors I can open.

 

  • I wanna paint myself silver like one of those street performers, but I don’t wanna perform anything. I just wanna chill…
 
See???? I’m so interesting and don’t you feel better about yourself!
 
So now its your turn….give me some confessions.
 
 
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18 thoughts on “A Blogger Rite of Passage: CONFESSIONS!

  1. You want to come vacation in my apartment?

    We can go on online double dates together and paint the toenails on each other’s cankled feet!

  2. I confess that when I posted about my fudge protein muffin, the first word I used it MOIST! (WITH the exclamation point) and now I’m never removing what is now the most unpopular blogword (except amazeballs) if only on principle. Mahahah. Confession: If I could eat popcorn, frozen yogurt and chocolate all day and be full and not fat, I would. Sadly in college, I tried this diet and I got skinny, freezing and bitchy. And what a stupid thing to do for a supposedly ‘smart’ college student!

  3. I like how you casually threw “I’m a man” in there. I’m a man, duh! (Ok why did I make that lame joke? It’s not like I don’t hear it ALL the time.)

    I don’t know if I’ve ever made a confessions post. Now I want to look through my blog for it.

    I want to make an online dating profile for blog content. Every one of your posts about it CRACKS me up.

  4. confession:

    I have different voices narrating my thoughts. today it’s Paul Rudd. and I read this in my had in his “taxicab confessions” voice, like he says it in the movie Knocked Up.

    when I don’t have an answer for a question, or if the question is stupid, I give one of these three answers:

    -things you find in a circus. (also in a funny narration, like something sinister)
    -some people say cucumbers taste better pickled
    -ask me a different question

    hope you’re having a fab vacation!

  5. I had lobster for the first time and didn’t love it. Entirely too much work and not enough food for the effort–at least i didn’t have to pay for it.

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