Have any of you heard of Justin Halpern?
He’s the creator of the Twitter phenomenon “Shit My Dad Says and published his first book about a year ago. He also had CBS pick his book up for that kinda failed series, “S*** My Dad Says”
PS, my first book comes out … never.
But as I said in this post, my mom sure knew how to be silly. I have a feeling if I knew where twitter and blogs could take you when I was eight, I would have written all the shit she said down cause I’d be a guaranteed a book deal.
But I didn’t and all I have is my goldfish memory. And with that I leave you today, Mothers Day, with some shit my mom said.
“Ah Fuck! I hope you get a fucking ticket. Bitch. What? I can call her a bitch because she’s a woman.” -My mom when being cut off in L.A. traffic
” Big Macs are gods gift to mankind.” -My mom’s diet advice
“Just the usual Jew-fro” -orders to her hair stylist
“You can only call me ‘mummy’ when we’re in Sydney” -When visiting out family in Australia
“Cadbury Fruit and Nut” -When asked by her doctor if she is on any medication
“Who wear jean’s on an airplane? What is she, a cowgirl?” -My my mom, on an airplane
“I want to see Jay Leno tonight.” -I kid you not, my mom’s last words
What shit does your mom say???