There is nothing like crying your brains out after stating an opinion and having anonymous Internet people shatter you emotionally.
I mean, I dont do that, its a “for instance”.
But this article is not just for blogging, but I’ll use blogging as my paradigm. You can extract the lessons and apply them to the hate you receive on Face-Twitter-Space or even on your own comments.
Allow me to navigate you through the world of hate comments and what you can do about it if you get one.
1. You’re Attracting The Wrong Audience.
Sometimes when I write a post, inside my head-hole, I believe that people will automatically get my tone.
They’ll say to themselves OMG! Eden is taking a punch at oatmeal and blending a degree of disarming satire into it. lolz!
I know.Nobody should ever “lolz”.
But that never happens. Sometimes you’ll get a drive-by audience that is lured in by your headline, or because they were referred to your post by a shithead friend of yours.
Then they’ll lace you with their hate.
What to do: Don’t worry. These individuals will never understand you. Don’t try to please them, its a waste of your time. Disregard them as people that will never visit your blog again and will just travel from blog-to-blog as nerdy nomads because nobody will accept them.
2. You’re Taking a Controversial Stance on Something.
Remember all the hoopla last year from a certain Marie Claire article?
You didn’t? Dont fret, it wasn’t all that exciting.
But this sparked an outrage which resulted in a sort of war between commenters (on other blogs, not mine, I refused to even write about it and give that article and those bloggers more press.
If you take a stance on something. Anything. People will disagree with you.
What to do: Don’t be afraid to take a stance. Although it’s way easier if you’re an anonymous obese dude like me taking a stance on something. But stand by it, and enjoy the golden shower of hate. And yes, initials aren’t very anonymous, by the way, and usually I can figure those people out.
3. You’re Forgetting All Of Your Commenters Names and Like Totally Ignore Them.
I have a pack of commenters that are loyal, nice, smart, and honestly? Way funnier than me.
But I totally ignore them. I forget all of their names. I have the memory of a goldfish sometimes and with all the shit I’ve been going through with my dad having an aggressive cancer, I’ve kinda fallen off the blogosphere.
I know, lame excuse.
But if I continue to ignore them, these pack of loyal commenters will slowly sour. They’ll turn on me as readers and comment with I used to be a fan of Eden’s Eats! She’s so into herself I can’t stand it. I’m immediately starting an internet rumor about how she has gonorrhea!
What to do: I guess you have to engage with these people. I know. What a pain in the ass. To the pack of commenters: you know who you are. This is me engaging. I’ll shoot you an email when I come back to earth.
4. You’re Forgetting That People Will Generally Dislike You.
I once read a blog about dogs. Way more interesting than food, as I was ooing and ahhing at all the cute doggie pictures I noticed that the blog was written by a little old lady. She seemed really nice.
But in the comments, some asshole called her a ’stupid moron’.
I’m like, “holy poopy pants! That’s so mean!”
But then I realized that people will generally dislike you. It doesn’t make them bad. It makes them people.
What to do: Embrace the idea that people will dislike you. It’s OK. Not everyone has to like you. I mean, really? You’ve just spent the last three minutes of your life reading this blog post. You can’t really have that much going on.
5. People Love To Complain.
People are wired to complain. So if you spend several minutes crafting a post, expect people to take a look and say how can I complain about this? In what magical way can I drop an intellectual turd into her comment stream?
Which is OK. Because it’s not like I’m splicing genes with these posts. I hear complaints all the time. Hell even I love to complain!
Everyone loves to complain. Its a thrill.
What to do: Accept complaining as art. If they do it well, it’s nice to look at. There are blogs that are all about complaining and they actually are quiet popular. Why? As I stated, EVERYONE loves a good complaint.
6. You’re too thin
Its an unspoken rule that you can bash a skinny girl for being that way but not someone who is overweight. Same thing goes for smoking.
But thats not really the point…The point is, if people say your too skinny, you probably are. You might be in denial or whatever and if thats the case all the more power to you and I hope you find comfort in your life while you have it cause it won’t last long. Does that give people the right to harass you? No. But if you post pictures of your skeletal self with you bowls of whipped air, chances are, your gonna get some hate comments.
What to do: You have two options:
1) gain weight, get help, see a therapist, see a dietitian, eat a sandwich (with REAL bread, not that super light kind with like negative three carbs or whatever).
2) Stop posting emaciated pictures of yourself, of your endless olympic training workouts, and of your carb-fat-calorie-taste-free funnel cake.
There you have it.
I hope this helps you in your blogging, facebook, and twitter endeavors.
And now we’ve come to the end of my post so let the golden shower of hate comments begin.
- 1 1/2 cup all purpose or brown rice flour
- 1/4 cup maple syrup or sweetener of choice
- 1 Tbsp baking powder
- 1/2 tsp kosher salt
- 1/2 tsp cinnamon
- 1/4 tsp nutmeg
- 1 cup milk of choice
- 1/2 cup greek yogurt
- 2/3 cup mashed baked sweet potatoes
- 2 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted or canola oil
- 3 large eggs
Pre-heat your waffle iron. Depending on the type of iron you have, you may need to lightly oil it. Use your experience with your own equipment in deciding. Combine all of the dry ingredients in a large bowl and whisk them until well combined. Separate the egg yolks from the whites, reserving both. In a medium bowl, combine the milk, greek yogurt, mashed sweet potato, melted butter, and egg yolks. Whisk until well combined. In a small bowl, beat the egg whites at a high speed for about two minutes. Stiff peaks should form when you lift the beaters. Set aside. Pour the wet ingredients over the dry ingredients. Whisk until well combined, but do not over mix. The batter should be nearly smooth. Fold in the beaten egg whites. If you are adding the pecans, you should fold them in now. The batter is now ready for your waffle iron. The amount of batter and cooking time will vary according to the size and temperature setting of your waffle iron.