Chocolate Fig Cupcakes with Ricotta Frosting

Unless you work under unique conditions, chances are in real life random people do not come up to you spewing mean terrible comments. But online, its a whole different ball game. Whether you run your own blog online, or have a formspring account, people loaded with mean comments will some how make their way to you sooner or later. As an avid reader of a variety of different blogs I have seen people leave negative and offensive comments online lately on my blog as well as on a few of my dear friends’.
I thought I’d give you bloggers and readers some ways I think are best to cope with the negative comments.


  1. Ignore it:  This only works if you are dealing with people that don’t have constructive criticism.
  2. Respond: I respond to each even “semi” mean comment with how I felt about what they said.
  3. Have a Confidant: We all need someone that we can run to when people are being mean. When we were kids, it was our mommy. Now as adult it’s your spouse or your most trusted girl friend. You need that person that you can tell what is happening and they can be the voice of reason and talk you off the ledge. They are a necessary part of blogging and once you share your woes, and wallow in it together, they will help you see the humor and push you forward so you can move on.
  4. Don’t take it personal: I put it out there.  I need to have a thick skin. Remember that whether you like it or not you’ve created an online persona. Unfortunately people have the audacity to believe they know who you are as a person based on what they read online. Of course that isn’t the case. Someone may dislike you because of your religion, or because they are reminded of someone they disliked, or just because they are having a bad day. Deal with the situation by refusing to let mean remarks seep in and affect your character as a person.
  5. Can’t win them all: There is no way I can win every reader over every time.  I am not going to try either.

Keep in mind that the majority of the time nice comments will over power mean comments. Living in fear of mean comments is no reason to prevent yourself from having an online outlet.

How do you deal?

Ok, enough tough stuff…..Food!!!!!

For these cupcakes (also entered for my cupcake competition) you will need:

1 1/8 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 cup almond meal
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon ground cloves
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 cup coconut milk
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1/3 cup oil
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 cup melted chocolate
1/2 cup finely diced fresh figs (about 2 whole figs), or 1/3 cup chopped dried figs

In a large bowl, sift together flour, almond meal, baking powder, baking soda, spices, and salt.Whisk together coconut milk sugar, melted chocolate, oil, and extract. Add, the egg and then proceed to add a third of the mix at a time until all the dry and wet ingredients. Fold in fig. Fill cupcake liners with about 3 tablespoons of batter (cups should be just under 2/3 of the way full). Bake for 22-25 minutes or until set, and toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Transfer to cooling rack and allow to cool completely.

For the ricotta frosting you will need….

  • 8 ounces of ricotta (drained with a paper towel or cheese cloth for a few hours or overnight to get the excess water out)
  • 1 stick of butter (1/2 c)
  • 2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 2 cups of powdered sugar

Mix but butter mixture with a mixer until creamed. Then proceed to add in the ricotta until they cream together nicely. Add the extract and powdered sugar until well combined. It should look something like this when your done. Frost away!

And maybe dust with some cocoa powder

yes, sloppy looking, but it has no impact on their high end taste!

25 thoughts on “Chocolate Fig Cupcakes with Ricotta Frosting

  1. I’ve only gotten one semi mean comment. More backhanded than anything. However, I was the topic of a thread on a message board that turned really ugly, so yes, the internet is full of losers who like to rip apart people.

    Move on, you are better anyways. 🙂 That’s how I deal at least.

  2. Hmmm, when people do or say mean or catty things, I like to sort of make a joke in the hopes that they will see how petty or silly they are being. If this doesn’t work, I put a hit out on them.
    Unrelated note- I do so love the humble fig. Nature’s sweetest food… except for maybe dates…
    I am also getting super excited to get outta this cold and get some sunshine!

  3. I’ve never gotten a genuinely mean comment. Except from some ex roommates. Maybe I need to spout out more controversial stuff. -shrug- I have gotten them for stuff I’ve written. I try and see -what- they are talking about, even if I don’t agree, and make a note for the future. Unless they are just idiots, then I cannot be held accountable for a snarky reply.

  4. One thing I learned through blogging is that even some innocuous comment can set off a tirade. There are all sorts of people out there, and some of them have issues. Which they may take out on the blogger. And a lot of times, because of the cold blank way words online just bounce off the emotionless computer screens, things can be misinterpreted. Some people are just more sensitive in certain ways.

    Haha, you already know I just recently went through some drama…and honestly, talking to you helped. I also got to tell a couple other close friends, and that helped, too. It brought me back to reality, that people aren’t really cruel. It’s just the anonymous wall of the Internet that spurs cruelty in people because it just feels so…unreal sometimes. For some readers, the bloggers seem less like a real person than a icon or celebrity one love to hate or love to love.

    I for one…having been mish-mashed into the annoying internet dramas, find it tiresome and petty, but…inevitable. And as a journalist, it’s actually done great service in helping me develop some pretty damn thick skin.

    You rule, Eden. And so does those points you mentioned. I agree with all of them, as you can see.

  5. Do you ever notice how mean commenters are always anonymous? I think this pisses me off the most. If you’re going to be a dickhead, own up to it. I actually once busted a friend of mine for being an anonymous dickhead commenter.

    I recently was told by a commenter that I was completely narcissistic and that all of my readers thought that way as well. I talked to John, cried my eyes out, took apart the definition of narcissism and realized how untrue this is and how anyone that knew me in person would disagree. To retaliate, I wrote back the nicest comment possible. I feel like people who leave these comments what you to get pissed off and that will only make them happier!

  6. and i totally agree w/ gillian on the anon’s. yes, own if it you want to be nasty.

    for those who say they’ve never gotten a mean comment? oh you can have some of mine, i have hundreds to share.

    it sucks. I have gone full circle, ignore, delete, respond, bring it up in future posts, try to not let it bother me.

    what i do now is delete it if it’s really foul. and the comments i get that are mean can be really….disgusting. Those get deleted.

    If the person has any kind of sane logic or is not anon, i will keep it up, and maybe reply publicly to them. Toss up.

    I think your point 6, cant win over every reader, every time, is so spot on!

  7. I seriously hope you win with these – they sound amazing! Enough so that I would try them (and I am a self professed chocolate hater and avoid everything that includes it))

  8. This is great Eden.. because a lot of people don’t really like to talk about negative comments. I know I’ve gotten my fair share, and my most effective way to deal with them is to respond. I find that if I don’t speak up, I feel defeated which only makes matters worse.

  9. I’ve gotten a few mean comments in my time and I always respond, as politely as possible, letting the person know what I think about what they wrote. Be the bigger person, you know the deal.

    These cupcakes are awe-inspiring. I am a HUGE fig lover and never pass up a chance to indulge in them.

  10. Eden, mean comments are tough, but honestly if the person can’t even post who they are, it isn’t really worth listening to. Most mean comments are anonymous. At least have some balls and stand behind your comment! I think you dealt with it very well!
    I still wish you luck on the cupcake contest. These look very delicious. Wish I could be there to taste test!

  11. I haven’t really ever gotten a mean comment. (Knock on wood!) But it also feels like a right of passage for a blogger, that I haven’t gotten to go through yet.

    It’s also a fact that it happens more for popular blogs, and it’s kind of like a price you have to pay to have a lot of followers with a lot more opinions!

  12. When did you get a mean comment? I’ve yet to receive one myself, so I’m not sure what that means (as Tori said.) I agree that the fact people can be Anonymous seems to be a license for leaving comments out of insecurity instead of constructive criticism. Most of the time it’s just some sort of projection they would never actually voice in real life, so I would just disregard.

    But I also think that sometimes people interpret certain comments as “mean” that are actually just in opposition to what the blogger feels is “right.” I know on some of the bigger blogs, if someone leaves a comment that isn’t 100 percent agreeing with the blogger, all the other readers jump on that person for being mean and catty. While I agree there are a bunch of trolls out there that leave ridiculous comments unrelated to anything, I also think that sometimes people interpret a challenge to their thinking as an insult.

    Discussion is good. Blatant ignorance annoys the crap out of me 😉

  13. angry commenters just hate themselves and have to hide behind mean comments. i know we put ourselves out there by having a blog but i sometimes just don’t get the joy people get out of bringing down people! great tips girl 🙂 i’ve just learned to delete the comment and move awwwn

  14. omg. chocolate and figs. 2 of my fave things! think i could use all almond flour? i have a gluten allergy and still getting the hang of baking. maybe add an egg so it wouldn’t be so dense? i don’t even flinch about a neg comment, if these people have the time to consciously compile such negativity, i feel sorry for them in their own personal lives. i never respond to that!

    • I find that my best gluten free baking includes flax instead of part of the flour. It can act like an egg and make it less dense! Usually I blend gluten free oats, flaxmeal, and a little water in place of flour. Almond meal can make it super dense and a little flat.

    • NOT my kitchen aid, although I wish I had the moola for it! (kitchen aid people are more than welcome to send me a free one to “review”). It belongs to me boss… she is obviously cool. Me? not so much

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