Lets face it, the holidays are the time of year where many blogs dispense their favorite holiday treats and what they do to avoid gaining weight because of them. Its sad that we don’t give ourselves an actual holiday from strict exercise and diet rules. Anyhow, I’ve read and heard some pretty ridiculous advice that I though I’d share and give my little rebuttal.
Stupid Suggestion #1: Avoid Booze with all costs during the holidays
Telling people to avoid alcohol at a holiday party is like telling women inside of Nordstrom to avoid the shoe department. Ain’t gonna happen.
Stupid Suggestion #2: Chew Gum to Avoid Eating Too Much.
Chew gum at a holiday party? You want to look classy and glamorous at a holiday party not like Marisa Tomei in My Cousin Vinny.
Stupid Suggestion #3: Look Up Calories Before You Eat.
At your holiday party when you whip out your smart phone and say to the hostess, “Um, wait a minute, I need to look up how many calories are in that bacon-wrapped scallop.”
Stupid Suggestion #4: When baking holiday treats such as cookies, light a green apple scented candle which can reduce your appetite.
Forget the green apple candle, (Does anyone even own that fragrance?) or any candle, for that matter. How often do you get to enjoy the aroma of spicy cloves and sweet vanilla bean? Have some faith in yourself. You can bake and smell cookies without eating an entire tray. Right? If not, then employ Stupid Suggestion #2. I prefer wintergreen or peppermint.
Stupid Suggestion #5: Take a purse, notebook, framed photo, business card holder, or some unobtrusive item that is too large for your pockets, so that one hand will remain occupied during most of the party – you will only have one hand free to hold a drink or shake hands of people you meet.
Even though culinary school has groomed me to be an excellent multitasker, I somehow can’t carry on a conversation holding a framed photo in my hand at a dinner party. Please, I think you’ll not only look a little confused, hypochondriacs will hate you for your insistence on hand shaking.
Stupid Suggestion #6 :Talk, don’t chew: Remember, conversation is calorie-free!
Yes, calorie free, but a chatterbox. Punching you in the face for blabbing too much is also calorie free and might even burn a quarter of a calorie if you put some energy into that punch.
I know, I haven’t done a recipe in a few days. Maybe I’ll churn one out tomorrow. Its been a nightmare with my dad’s med lately because the pharmacies keep messing up pills and that’s no good. My dad can’t drive either so I need to “hold the fort” up, so to speak. We still don’t know whats going on with his bodily pain but we hope to find out soon. Once again, I cannot thank you guys enough for the wonderful support you’ve all given me.