Thoughts on Food Network “Chefs”

I actually watch food network every so often. Not as much as I used to. In its early years, I was about eleven and was GLUED to it. Remember the shows, “Door Knock Dinners” and “Sweet Dreams” (a purely dessert show, obviously), and “The Galloping Gourmet” (this was actually a show from the 70’s, but they used to play it at like 1 am so I’d catch it every so often when I was jet lagged). I miss the old food network.

I don’t watch all that much TV these days in general, I usually turn it on when I’m home alone so I dont feel….well…alone!  But every so often I do catch up on food network. More so at the gym to be honest because if its not ESPN or CNN, its usually Food network, cause everyone wants to see what they want to burn off, right?

My last few posts have been rather serious, so I thought I’d lighten the mood and give you my take on some of the “chefs” Food network has given birth to. Bear in mind that I am a trained chef so I’m picky and biased, just a warning:

Paula Deen: I’m reluctant to bash and criticize a seemingly nice, southern lady. I certainly wish I had a grandmother like that seeing is that my grandmother is her polar opposite (bitter, German, Jew, and only cooks stuff that comes in a box or can). She also know how to laugh at herself which I really appreciate (check out her funny or die videos). I like that she doesn’t apologize for the truckloads of butter she uses. And really, who’s to say butter is that bad? I love her dogs too, I like that she gives them whatever she’s cooking, I just hope she doesn’t feed them chocolate anytime soon.

Anthony Bourdain: technically, not on food network anymore, but thats where he started his tv career. Here’s a little confession, I have a tiny crush on him. He’s old enough to be my dad but there’s that bad ass, dark humor, foodie thing about him I sorta find attractive. Maybe he reminds me a little of myself. I read his books and I fully respect his candidness and honesty about the business. He’s ballsy and is will to try anything, he’s also rather humble and although knows high end food…he isn’t pretentious and appreciates a good, simple, street food kind of meal.

Bobby Flay: this guy reminds me of the kid that got made fun of in gym class for having red hair and freckles. You might hate me for saying this, but I probably would have made fun of him too. He irks me. I think the fact that he is an Iron Chef is ridiculous. This may sound harsh, but he seems a little egocentric to me. You know his show, “throwdown”? I bet this was his pitch: “Ok guys, I have a great idea for my next show. I’m going to do some research, find local chefs who take pride in a recipe that has been either in their family for decades or that has made them famous, then I’m going to travel there, make a completely unauthentic version of that recipe, and possibly have people tell them that my version is superior. Oh, and during the majority of the shows we’re going to mess the recipe up while creating it in the test kitchen and tell the audience that I created the recipe last night with my wife. Did I mention that I’m an egomaniac?” Classy, Bobby, real classy.

Sandra Lee: Ok first, if your teaching me all these semi-homemade recipes, I expect you to at least “semi” eat! this girl is too thin to be making cupcake snowmen. I know, who am I to say shes got issues when I’m rather thin myself, but I’m also not teaching people to put canned pie filling in store bought pie crust? Really? You need a show to tell you that?

Guy Fieri: Oh Guy, sweet sweet Guy. I hate you and your 1950′s via 1992 Swingers clothes and if I hear you describe a sandwich as “money” one more time fire I will shoot from my ears. Enough said!

Tyler Florence: I don’t know, he seems nice enough, right? He’s not very annoying and that’s probably why the Food Netowrk has only given him one show.He’s suave and I totally have the hots for him too. He does use the word “boom” a lot, but hey, better than, “BAM”.

Another list of more chefs to come soon!

sorry no recipe today, yoga school took up most of my day!

13 thoughts on “Thoughts on Food Network “Chefs”

  1. I love watching cooking shows on TV. And yes, I think I liked Food Network a lot better in the beginning! It just seemed more real somehow. I used to watch a show by Tyler Florence called “Food 911.” I miss the old shows like that. I used to watch Emeril’s show a lot too – didn’t mind so much that he always said “Bam!” since that was way before every single person had their own catchphrase!

  2. I agree with so many of these! I will say that with regards to Sandra Lee I have a ton of respect for her because she pulled herself out of the depths of Appalachia (or something similar) to make herself a huge star. And she did it all on her own and helped her siblings in the process. She doesn’t exactly reinvent the wheel but I have to give her props!

    I’m surprised you had no comment on Giada. Or her boobs?

  3. I have never seen Sandra Lee’s show before. I pretty much agree with you on Bobby Flay and even though I would never make her food, I love to watch Paula Deen. She has no shame with what she puts in her dishes. Giada DeLaurentiis is probably my favorite. She just seems so nice!

  4. I admire Sara Lee too. She didn’t just win some reality show to gain success. Plus she is like Martha and all around talented.

    It’s people like you that have made me who I am today making fun of red heads and freckles 😉

    Oh I could watch Giada for hours. There is just something about her.

    I can’t wait for your take on RR, she does have good cookware!!

  5. I used to have FN on ALL the time. Now I don’t even bother turning on the tv b/c I am never in front of it long enough to watch anything. Besides, if I see one more freaking cake or cupcake competition I may toss the tv out the window. I do love Giada and I like Guy. I love his personality I guess is what it really comes down to. I used to love RR, but I really can’t handle hearing her say “yummo,” “EVOO,” or something about burning the bread any longer.

  6. haha i LOVE paula deen mostly because of her liberal butter use and personality. she had some show i saw once where she had a ‘party’ with guests and they cooked etc, it was hilarious. i also love Guy because he comes to the south where i live all the time! his cookbook is not worth the money lol btw, non of the recipes are enlightening or original. i love the diner drive ins and dives show too, give me cooking inspiration!

  7. I am not familar with too many. Ever watch Hell’s Kitchen?
    I know the guy Curtis Stone from TV a lot – he seems like a good chef I guess. I always wonder the difference between all of them though you know? Like how does Curtis Stone differ from Jamie Oliver, etc?

  8. hahahahaha i totally feel the same way about bobby flay. i think he’s a douche and i better majority of the time his food isn’t even close to being as good as the people who specialize! although i can’t front that i do want to go to his restaurant haha

    ugh who i CAN’T STAND is rachel ray.

    love me some emril

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